S1:E53 – A Night with the CKG

Theater of the Mind productions are not suitable for all audiences. We say bad words while doing bad things to bad people. We lie, we cheat, and we do all the other things that a proper group of heroes do while trying to save the world. Listener discretion is advised. Welcome to Theater of the Mind Retribution. My name is Mike. I'm your dungeon Master. And this week's question from the Ultimate RPG campfire card deck by James Amato is which aspects of your daily routine do you look forward to the most? Why do you enjoy these things so much?

My name is Amanda and I'm playing Mel Kelly. Mel loves her morning warmup, yoga, whatever you want to call it. That's why she always takes last watch, because then she can leisurely wake up and maybe observe something occasionally and do all of her stretches and just center herself with everything. Make sure that all of her mental boxes are all tidy and taped up and in their appropriate corners. And just shove that over there.

Yep. Sweep out the good.

We just sweep out all of the cobwebs full of creepy crawling. Everything's just all perfect and centered. And then she gets her morning cup of coffee.

I'm Jeremy. I'm playing Elliot Brandy Bain. Elliot, Brandy Bain's favorite part of his morning routine is tending to the horses, checking them out, make sure they don't have anything in their feet that they don't have any hot spots, kind of brushing them off, getting them saddled, ready for the day. Because horses are honest. They don't lie. They're not smart, but they're honest. So Elliot doesn't ever have to question their motives. He knows what they are. They're quite simple. And that small period in the mornings, especially when it's kind of brisk, and that's his time to, as Mel pointed out, sweep the cobwebs away from the night and get prepared for. For whatever the day brings. But for just a small period of time, he's communing with nature and something that he loves. And for a little bit, for a short period of time, life is very simple and he enjoys that time.

I am Brunel. I am playing Ulnach Vaga Johnson. Our boy Ulnock doesn't really have a morning routine. He just kind of wakes up reluctantly most days because, you know, he's like, fuck, it is your whole day.

Yeah, it's daily routine.

You have to be in the bar.

Okay.

Do I have a routine? No.

You may still have not an answer.

I don't. So what the day does he turn.

In three circles before he goes to bed? Or something.

Have you considered anything?

Not anymore. We solved that problem.

Have you considered cleaning your axe between decapitations?

No. I like the stain that it leaves on the metal.

Emery is horrified.

That axe has a nice caramelization to it.

Now at this point.

Ew.

It's a patina.

Yeah.

The axe.

I.

Come from blunt force. From hucking this fake Mjolnir at everybody. Do I clean my hammer? That sounds dirty.

I'm pretty sure when it comes flying back to you, it cleans itself.

Gravity cleans itself. Yeah.

No matter what that is a euphemism for is. Yes, you should.

We highly recommend Olok that you clean your weaponry.

Yes.

I don't have a routine. There's. My life is pure chaos. Ulnak wakes up and he just starts doing things. Because that's what I do.

And not in the fucking military anymore.

I do whatever the fuck I want. So I guess his favorite part of the day is waking up. Even though it's also his least favorite part of the day. It's a dual edged sword, but we get to be involved in a bunch of fun activities. We might kill a dude. We might learn about new magic. We might throw our hammer at something, you know, that's pretty cool. So, yeah.

So what you're saying is the best part of your waking up is the Folgers in your cup.

Exactly.

I'm not gonna lie. Old Octa sounds to me like a guard dog. Like, he reasons like a guard dog.

I'm just ugly.

I woke up on site ready for.

Anything that comes our way. Yes, I talk all the shit.

Hanging out with all the friends roll terribly.

I'm just happy to be here.

Oh, look, I get to go bite someone.

I'm just happy to be involved.

The fact that he was a werewolf just adds icing to the cake.

It really does. It really does.

Hi, I'm Downs. I play James o'. Brien. And James favorite part about the day is making coffee so that Mel doesn't turn him into a pretzel.

She doesn't stab it.

If you stretched more often, it wouldn't be a.

It would be relaxing.

No, that's pretty much it. It's just like making the coffee. Like prepping breakfast for everybody.

At least one person's not mad this morning.

You know what?

Ulnock likes to change his answer. Breakfast. Whatever it is, I don't even care.

Right?

Eggs, bacon, squirrel, it doesn't matter. Love it. Good stuff.

Cause for James, that's the best way to gauge how everyone's doing for the day. Like, okay, Mel has her coffee. She didn't bite me when I handed it to her. Perfect. Okay. Elliot's not yelling at himself behind a bush. Okay, we' good there. All not ate all of his food. And he chewed this time.

That's pretty good.

He didn't say much. Right?

Like, yeah.

I'm Casey. I play Emory Lee. And Emory's favorite part of the day is actually at the end of the day when we've gotten to where we're spending the night. Camp is set up. We just kind of have a little bit of downtime. At the end of the day when everything's a little bit settled, we can just kind of hang out and be around each other. Maybe James is cooking dinner. Emory might pull out her sketchbook. We might pull out the deck of cards and play a cheater's game of Go Fish. Like the end of the day, after we've made camp and just have a little bit of time to be equal. I think that's my favorite part of the day.

I think we're going to rename that to rogue fish.

Rogue fish.

Amortar's favorite part of his daily routine is also breakfast because he listened to his mama when he was growing up, and she always told him that breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

That was a line made up in the 60s.

Yep. She bought into that. Yep.

Propaganda.

Propaganda.

That's the word.

Thank you. That's the word. Propaganda machine. And sold it to him. Old clothes. That's a lot.

I will say. If I don't have protein when I get up, I am not a functioning person. It does things to my brain and I cannot keep track of anything. So I have to have breakfast every day.

I get bitey nine times a day.

He totally does.

I forget to eat at lunchtime.

Jeremy's like, can't confirm.

Can't confirm.

He's really loving the major city breakfast options. Oh, I bet he digs the croissants.

The croissants.

Croissants. And the crepes and the pancakes and.

The bacon and the bagels. Bagels.

Yeah.

I would like to think that there's.

He's a big Dunkin Donuts, bro.

Dunkin Donuts.

Amortar is going to walk in this world, and by the time we get there, he'll have gained 40 pounds and can't lift his own sword.

He's about to have.

His armor doesn't fit anymore.

Yeah.

There's a necromancer version of crepes called creeps.

They have little like, he's got his pauldrons on and then like it's like a midriff plates like your belly. Yeah, yeah.

The cuirass is off in the corner.

Now we're just looking at Moritar. Like, give him another month. He's gonna grab a heart attack.

Roll for initiative. Heart attack.

Let's go ahead and roll. For recap. I rolled a 14. The 14 IEst.

I was safe this time.

17 13.

I got a 2.

That sounds like me.

You all right?

So last episode we were still in the town of Carson.

We Iowa.

Iowa.

At the start of last episode, it was Carson, Iowa.

It was. And then it was called something else.

Well, the first thing we attended was the naming ceremony where they unveiled a new plaque which was strangely magical and looks like some demon shit. The town is currently named Maith Hel. Remember that was how it was pronounced. City of Lights.

At the top there getting nailed it.

We talked to the priest who was one of the other few people in the audience that did not look happy about the renaming. We noticed though that he only called it by the name and did not call it by the name Carson any longer and did not in fact recognize the name Carson.

Yeah, he looked confused about the name.

We learned a little bit from him about Angelique is one of missing girls on Lily Curly. She had an outburst and hurt her brother. Her family took her to Fort Le Rouge for medical help and he gave her some laudanum, which, as we all know, fixes every problem.

Of course.

It really does. It's better than NyQuil.

So.

We learned a little bit about the first visitor to Carson after the lights turned on, which was a college age girl who only stuck around for one night and then left early. Suspiciously early in the morning.

Allegedly walk of shame.

Allegedly could be a walk of shame.

We learned a little bit about the guard routes in town. I think we also we went and we talked to. What's his name?

Skylar Rhodes.

Skylar Rhodes.

And you talked us out of cross dressing. I did.

Would have been really fun shenanigans, but ultimately completely not helpful.

It would not have been helpful. We did get some information from him as well. He's where I think we got most of the information about the first visitor and how after. After she came through, security tightened at the bank of the laundromat and at Martin Rouge's place. There is a foot patrol in town every night. And in the Roy's neighborhood, Francoise Cloy's butler is very responsive. Almost like he lurks right next to the door and waits for people to show up.

He's like ding dong ditches away from it.

Skyler and his crew are planning some shenanigans tonight and invited us to meet them behind city hall to join them. And that is where we left off as far as like health.

Absolutely. That's awesome.

And I think the consensus is that we were going to join in on the shenanigans garden.

Absolutely.

I mean Elliot impressed everyone because apparently he's a hidden skater dude.

Oh yeah, that's right.

He was a skater baller ass trick.

I didn't remember they said see you later boy.

Hey, sometimes there's not. Never forget that real cowboys that ride horses have amazing balance. And as a younger man in the military, you know you learn things.

He was a skater boy.

He might not have been but he had people on his crew platoon that were. And you know there's a lot of time with nothing going on. You teach each other shit.

This is facts.

So you guys are doing like Red Bull esque tricks on a ship out in the middle of.

Oh no, he was army. He was army.

Yeah, right.

He was motorpool. He was motor pool.

Here's another place of a concrete floor.

He had concrete.

So yeah, you guys just finished your chats with the ckg, the cool kids group and are back at the inn killing time till you're supposed to meet up with them again. Assuming that's what you're planning on doing.

See?

Yes.

What are you doing until you're doing.

That mouth feels kind of dirty.

We're flirting with.

For flirting with a bunch of kids?

Yeah, like those teenagers were loving it though dude. All about it. Made their whole year probably.

They shave like twice a month.

That doesn't matter.

I still think it would have been so much more.

It would have been. It would have been. But it would have been completely unknown.

Not a good idea.

But think of the memories it would have made. You know what I mean?

Think of the views.

I don't know if you could have handled yourself in that disguise.

You could have seen Elliot's vision of.

A teenage girl, whatever that might be. Oh, that'd have been fun.

I picture very like girl next door circa 1955.

I was thinking 50s. I didn't want to say it.

Oh no. 80s 80s guys. 80s.

So we wouldn't have gotten a poodle.

Skirt like gag me with a spoon.

Oh my God, Val.

Girl.

Was Elliot into Valley Girls.

Now you'll never know. You wouldn't let him do it. He didn't let him know you didn't let him do it.

You don't know who hates the Valley Girls. That's why she fled there.

That could be.

He'll never come down here.

Why she loved for California.

Right. I'm sure there's going to be plenty of other opportunities for us to get intel in unique ways.

That seems vaguely sinister.

That did sound like a loose threat almost.

I'm a little bit worried about what shenanigans means. We didn't really get a clear picture of what they're planning.

I don't know. Maybe they could just put salt in the drinking fountains. I don't know. Their shenanigans seemed pretty lame if you ask me.

You were in college, right?

I know. They're not. They haven't gotten there yet. They're still doing high school pranks. Oh, God. There's going to be a dead deer in the bathroom.

What the fuck?

Actually, that really happened.

We're on the Godfather over here. He's going to put a fucking deer head in somebody's bed.

What high school did you do? Those.

That actually happened to me as a human, not as Mel. So, yeah, that's what kind of high school I went to.

At my high school, they put a dead fish in the. In one of the intake vents right at.

Yeah, no, they literally left a dead deer in the girls bathroom after a senior prank one year. That happened. So.

Damn.

That's the school I went to.

That's if I hate our janitors.

Pretty much, yeah.

I think.

All.

With your urine.

Yeah, that happened in my high school once.

Somebody put a turkey in one of the lockers as a prank as well. Like a Wild Turkey. They shoved a wild turkey in one of the lockers.

I can't even pretend to fucking act like I would have dealt with that professionally at all.

Oh, food. The rage. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God.

The point being people who worked at.

The fucking college as janitors, though, even with the shit we found, right?

Like the sheer violent rage.

No, the point being is that high school level pranks are not all that interesting.

They're so. I highly doubt. Ridiculous. It's not like they're gonna blow up city hall. I don't think those kids have enough ordinance to do something like that.

And you can't make Molotovs with beer.

Unless, of course, those kids have magic.

Ah, not very flammable.

In which case, who knows?

If they do, they're not talking even to us. But if they invited us along, we'd see it.

I mean, from their perspective. They knew that anybody that was kind of weird, magicky, wind up Getting spotted in a. Yeah.

No, I mean, we talked about it and told them not to fess up if they do, but.

Mcstabby stab.

Doctor.

Yeah.

If I remember correctly, didn't they say we're going to City Hall?

Yes, that's where we're meeting them. And they mentioned that they broke in a couple times but didn't really find anything. But they're teenagers and they might have missed stuff. But it sounds like they're not really using City hall for. My guess would be that most of the Cajuns are meeting at Mortluge's house and not at City Hall.

But they did say that they increased security on City Hall. I'm curious to know why they increased increase security on Steel. I, I, I would like to get into Mon's house, but that's going to be very difficult. We know there's always people in and out of there.

Did I miss something?

Nothing.

You're good.

Okay.

I, I'm just. I'm paying attention to the DM over there.

What did we do?

Always a mistake.

We cracked him up somehow.

Oh, no.

Did we.

Did we just do a Raven?

But I'm.

It's gone.

We don't know.

I don't know. I'm, I'm. I want to sabotage these people in some way, but I worried about the fallout of that. That's all.

Yeah. I want to find. I want to find the missing people first. I would really like to know where their electricity is coming from. And then after all that's done, then I'm all in on sabotage.

We haven't seen.

But at the moment we are. I think our priority should be trying to find the missing people.

And that's where I'm a little bit worried about engaging with the shenanigans is depending on what that looks like. And if we're caught, then that. There goes our good favor with the Cajun.

I'm thinking that we should use the kids experience to get in. I'm pretty sure we can probably put some brakes on the shenanigans.

Show them if they get caught.

Yeah, they can be the distraction. Maybe.

But they can get us in. They've been there before. It'll be easier. We can do some look around and see what we can find. And I think we can probably direct these kids for a little bit.

Going with the manipulation. Loving it. Great.

We haven't seen any, like. We'll just call it suggestion.

We'll just make suggestion.

I know I used the bad word. I got you.

Well. And then quite frankly, as large as you are. I think weak's probably in Jimmy's need be.

We haven't seen any, like, large bundlings of wires or anything going up into buildings or anything that would blatantly look like abnormal power.

Okay.

I mean, every building has power lines.

Okay.

Does City hall happen to be adjacent to, like, old police station or city jail?

You're confident this town's small enough that city hall is police station or jail?

Okay.

This is a tiny town.

This is.

This is not a city shop. It's just the city government all happened.

Looks the front door looks at city.

Park, which is where the naming ceremony was.

Right.

Is there any chance that they're maybe keeping the people in city Hall?

That's what I may be hoping.

Jail area.

That's what I'm going to be hoping.

Does city hall have a basement?

I'm sure it does.

I'm glad I'm not the only one that thought that.

After the cool stuff that we found on DIA I totally think that everything has a secret tunnel.

We totally should have asked the kids.

Ah, we'll find out. We could just wait and go with the kids, and then all these questions will get answered. Yeah, I agree. Sitting here talking about what may or may not happen.

No, I know.

I know it'll happen. Whatever will happen.

So worst case scenario, if a bunch of blue lights come descending upon us with the lanterns and whatnot, we'll run.

Just like they will.

Okay. I just wanted to make sure that.

You know what?

We should set up a rendezvous point so when we scatter, we know where to meet up. Not that I ever did that as a youngster, but we need to set a rendezvous when we scatter. Oh, where we're gonna meet up?

The hotel.

The hotel that's run by one of the nut jobs.

Come right back here into the heart.

Of danger where they already know that we're at, because that's where I got my ass kicked.

So as a. Wait a minute. As a small town, I'm guessing there's at least a gas station.

I didn't say it was a good idea.

And I'm hoping the gas station is on the outskirts of town, not in the middle of town to catch the people as they drive in.

Will come to the.

Let's meet up at the gas station. If we. If we end up sc. If something happens and we have to scatter different directions, less of us will get caught. And we'll meet up at the gas station. And whoever gets caught, keep your mouth shut for eight hours. We will get you, out.

Okay.

Name, rank, and serial number. Got it.

James Cook. I don't know what that is.

555-555-5555. That's my Social Security number.

Serial number is 69 420.

Yeah, so don't get killed if they catch you. Just hopefully they're not gonna kill us on sight. At least they should take us to jail. We'll come get you.

Okay. James Cook, 67.

There you go.

That is my number now.

That'll work.

Who has the capability of manufacturing a blue light? Just those two?

Yes, please, both of you, don't get caught.

Of all of us. We should bring the lantern we were given with us, too. And we should not carry it.

Yeah, neither one of us should have it.

Therefore, shaking my head, it's not helpful.

Because don't forget, we have been given permission to investigate the disappearances. Monta Rouge asked us to do it, so we are legit.

Another story. Ooh, ooh. Cover story. If we get caught, we're all together, and we can just say that we were investigating a disturbance in city hall.

Cause we were kiddos running around because they still haven't taken our lantern back.

We do need to talk to Skylar and his bunch to let them know that they know what the story is as well.

Yes. Just like we won't actually dime them out. Just say that we heard something, and because we're investigating, we thought it might be relevant.

So hopefully Skylar and his kids will come up with a good story about why they went into the city hall. We saw a disturbance. We were investigating the disappearance. We checked him out. Here's the kids. I don't know. They chased a stray cat into city hall. Was trying to get out. Something like that. We'll talk to Skyler and his group and have them come up so we're all on the same page. And we'll also remind Skyler about the. I don't know if they should know about the rendezvous point or not.

Probably not. No. I don't feel like we should tell them.

I don't believe we should.

Have their own rendezvous part.

It's probably.

Hopefully they're smart enough. They probably will rendezvous at the skate park.

That would be my guess.

It's their domain.

And honestly, everyone expects them to be.

At the skate park.

Yeah.

Favorite train.

I would say that's Third Lair.

Yeah. Yes.

Oh, actually, no, I don't feel like that's the case. Because they would have had advantage on some of those tricks, and they did not have advantage of some of those.

I was gonna say in the event that the CKG ends up having to fight. They totally get lair actions at the skate.

Gonna get some real home alone shenanigans there.

Yeah.

Nice. Awesome.

They did build and, like, rehabilitate space.

So if we've. I'm guessing we've got time between now and the meetup. I just want to go check on the horses. Talk. And I don't need a conversation. Just to make sure the horseshoe is on top and everything's going well and he doesn't need anything from us. Oh, I'm totally gonna check on the horse.

That's me. I gotta go talk to Bert.

Check.

Sure.

And make sure my boy's good. I gotta know Bert's doing okay.

You know, orange stick's still good. Orange stick's.

So.

Yeah. I mean, you guys are welcome to come. I don't remember it being terribly far away, so I was just gonna go check. But other than that, I'm just gonna kind of relax.

Perfect. You go. Horse is good. Everything's on schedule.

Awesome.

Thank you.

And you don't get the feeling that, like, anything's going weirdly slow.

Okay, cool. Other single word affirmatives.

And we'll say that with your guys's conversation with the ckg. They told you that you'd meet up after lights out once curfew happens.

Okay. I wonder if they have a method that they've been using to easily sneak that.

We'll find out.

Yeah.

So we can.

What if it to death? Let's just go do it.

Fair.

There's. If there's no extra conversations you guys want to have. Actually, I'd also say you don't even have to go to the farrier. Farrier comes to you. Unless you want to go look at the horses.

I do.

Specifically. I will never trust anybody. Word on the horses. Elliot will always go check.

You see, the horses are in great shape. The farrier comes back with you to the inn so he can get his drink on.

Sweet.

I would like to specify that I am still wearing my southern gentleman outfit, but I am now wearing my cape so that I can wish if need be wild. I know.

That is a get up.

Yeah.

Faux show.

At least he doesn't have his hoss hat on.

And he left the.

The chaps, so they're still drying.

Yeah.

There's the hasn't.

Of course. Thank you for reminding me, though. Thank you.

You are a disguise. Thanks.

He's your distraction.

I was gonna say he is.

What is going on with that guy over there? Oh, that's just j.

He could stand out in the street. Chewing gum. And it would get people to look at him.

It would.

Plus the black eye and the fat.

Lip from that's a natural 2023.

Okay, you're confident that the reason people are looking at you is not what you were hoping. You're catching everyone's eye, but it's not like, look at that guy. It's ah, look at that guy.

Man, I look so nice.

Aw.

We tried to tell you the nicest way possible.

Well, I wanted to swish the cape, but the moment I swished the cape, I teleported 500ft that way.

Yeah, don't swish the cape.

Don't leave the freak of sulfur.

You can only do that once a day. Don't swish the cape.

Yeah.

But is the hat too much? Is it the hat?

It's totally the hat.

It's the hat.

Absolutely. It has nothing to do with that.

The icing on an already really unpleasant cake.

Screw it. I'm not changing.

I'm committed.

We're doing this.

Just take the hat off. It's white and you're sneaking around in the dark.

Elliot, do you still have your. Your quiver of amazingness?

I do.

Let's make sure that we have the broom in there so that we can give Jacob a quick getaway if he needs it.

All right. Broom is there. I have touched it and confirmed, correct?

Yep.

I got a hole in my pocket.

I love that hole in my pocket.

Well, the bar starts shutting down. It's getting close to go home time. So everybody's going home. Maxine is. Is polishing up the last of the bottles. Calls out, you know, last call shutting the place down. You know, you remember last night, she was downstairs for a fair while cleaning up after everybody was kicked out. There's curfew and then there's lightsack out. Two different timelines there.

Elliot will offer his assistance because he knew that she had a very short night last night because of all the everything going on. She's probably pretty tired. Like, hey, I can run a broom and I can mop if it would help speed things up so you can get to bed a little early yet. It's been a long night.

She happily takes you up on that.

Yeah. So she's got just for simple sweet. Wipe down whatever she wants me to.

Do while you're doing that. She's got the strong smelling bucket o chem and wiping down tables and counters. And she's, you know, she sets up a spot next to the fireplace once. Once the place is shut down. For the night. Just kind of riding out until she's got to kill the lights. Says, no point in me going to bed. Just to come back down here to turn the lights off to go back to bed.

If you want, I've got. I point to my watch. I. If you want, I'd be happy to shut the lights off. You can go to bed, but it's up to you. I understand if. Responsibilities.

Yeah.

I appreciate it, but I'm the one who'll have to answer to Leroy, so I'll make sure it all gets shut off. But thank you for your help. I appreciate you.

Thank you. Thank you for putting us up.

Absolutely.

No.

She's got a glass of something brownish. She's sipping on that while she's waiting for dinner to come.

Yeah.

The miss the whiskey of mixed reviews.

The Mr.

Whiskey and you all.

I think Mel curls up in a chair next to the fire and dozes off.

Okay.

Emory's probably sitting in a chair near there as well. Kind of just anxiously scribbling in her sketchbook.

Like, I've got, like, ice over my black eye.

Yeah, fair. She pulls out the last bag of frozen peas for you.

Oh, thank you very much.

Oh, God, thank you.

Thank you.

I can feel my own pulse.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm just. I'm gonna hang out by James and make sure he's nursing that eye correctly. He's just way too hard with the peas. If you push it in too hard, dude, it doesn't help. You gotta gent. Okay, you just punch yourself in the face again.

That explains the sting. I thought that was just the cold.

I'm a cook, not a doctor.

Jim, he's the one that has the medicine face.

I generally open the peas and cook them. I don't put them on my face.

I'm a cook and a doctor, damn it.

Pretend you're doctoring somebody else.

Oh, yeah. I am the freaking resident doctor.

You are.

Are.

That's awesome.

Dr. Taylor Tanner spy or whatever the.

Yeah, you've done almost all of that.

Yeah.

Loud noise.

Nice.

So, yeah, lights out comes. She lights out. She's let the fire pretty much die down to just cinders at this point. All right, folks, well, I'm gonna go get some sleep. You know, you guys rest. A reminder, you know, it is. Is after curfew, if for some reason you should have to leave, make sure you take your lantern with you so you don't get got.

Yes, ma'.

Am. But you. I would make sure Bonaventure is pretty stern with his after curfew. Activity. I'd make sure you gotta go. Reason to be wandering around with blue lantern. Cuz he will check.

Yes, ma'.

Am. Gotcha.

Baby D when she goes to bed.

Thanks.

Have a good one. Thank you again for the peas.

If you could peas put them back in the freezer when you're done. Hit you with the dad joke. Coming in hot.

That's a good peace of mind there.

Rebuttal.

I say we get it.

Give two peas in a pot.

Half hour. Give her plenty of time to get settled asleep. Perfect.

You guys just walking out the front door?

Yep. Fire up our lantern and walk out the front door. I think we should.

I think that might draw attention.

Is the front door the only door in and out of this place?

Well, we all know that the window's a viable.

It's the only one you've used. There might be one in the kitchen.

Saloon door.

Oh, there's probably. Let's go.

I. I think we should go out a back door. That's a good idea because the front door kind of opens up right onto the main street.

Yeah. Yeah, I think you're right. Good idea.

Do you get set up and you light the lantern?

No lantern, back door.

No lantern, back door. Why does that sound like a euphemism.

For something just for travel. Let's get group stealth.

Great. I'm so good at stealth, you guys.

I believe it. Genuinely.

17, 30, 20, 15.

7.

Well, Mel did better than Nolnok.

What's my stealth?

Hold on. I just want to make sure. Okay.

It's a plus two.

So six. I mean, it's not the worst.

It's not a NAT one.

It's not a NAT one.

I didn't. Maybe I knock over a pot because I'm walking out the door.

I tripped over something. I think I probably tripped over all knock.

That's impressive.

I fall off the step. Right. And Bell's right behind me.

Belloc tripped. I just rammed into the back of him. So we gotta be careful. Help your head. It hurts.

So you guys are in the back of the building. City hall's across basically Main street and down a couple blocks. You're doing okay.

I think maybe we should take a second and light the lantern. But then just keep it covered. What's a fair moment? That way if we are seen, we have it and we can just say, oh, no, it was behind me. You didn't see it?

Yeah, it was behind our mountain of a man.

That's a good choice. I like that.

Yep. So in the interest of caution, we'll Pause and take a second and do that.

That sounds like a.

And then keep it covered.

Which one of you three is carrying the lantern?

I mean, by our narrative so far, it would make sense for me to be carrying it. And if I'm walking behind Ulnok, that would explain why they didn't. Didn't see it. Because tiny person behind giant person.

Yeah.

Sounds good to me.

Yes.

And may move as stealthily as possible.

In my brain. This is very much a hood of lantern. So you literally just put your hand over the front of it.

It's going to get some perception checks too.

No.

How would you want that?

Oh, bro.

Crushed it.

That was a good one. But it's still a negative one. So it's 19.

I don't know why I look.

2017 for Elliot.

Passive.

25. Rolled a 19 plus 0 for a 19. Yes. I rolled a 19 plus 6. 25.

Perfect. So, yeah, you guys are able to. The high rollers. You can see where the watch is. Thankfully, they're carrying a blue light. Right. So you're able to stay far enough out of sight. You're pretty confident they haven't noticed you.

Okay.

It's so much helpful. You can see the other people.

The hardest spot to be sneaky is across that main drag because it's just got the perfect view all the way down to the main gate where there are several guards listed. And you can see. So you see City hall was a couple blocks down from the. From the inn across the street. A couple blocks further down is where the bank is. So we'll say it goes like City Hall. Laundromat bank. You see guards posted at both the Laundromat and the bank.

Yeah.

And we knew about that. So we'd probably give it as wide a breadth as possible.

You don't have to go to it. You can just see. Okay. The bank's further from you than City hall is.

Cool.

So you're just able to see it because they're standing under blue light making themselves known. Pretty beefy looking dudes. But you make it around back and you do see the CKG is awakening you.

Yeah. Are they. How stealthy are they being? I know I got a 25, so I see every.

Let's see, what is the CKG?

I am darkness.

I am the night. They're doing pretty damn good. You see them?

We are the Avengers.

I mean, you rolled a 25. Perception. There's not much you can't see.

Yeah.

You see them, but they're hard to see.

Yeah.

And the nice thing Is they're just natural apparel. Complements this mission quite well, guys.

That's fair.

Yeah, they're close. I can smell angst.

The hardest part about them is that they are. But you see Name loading.

Skyler.

Skyler. You see Skyler?

Legitimate buffering, you guys. I don't know if you saw it.

I saw the little blue.

You see Skyler waving you guys over. They're crouched down by some bushes or something. Something wave you guys over. Ah, you guys came.

Of course. You guys invited us. It'd be rude if we didn't show up.

We had to, like, wait for the chaperone, Maxine, to go to bed, Right?

Yeah, she's pretty diligent. But nobody saw you.

No.

No.

But I can say with confidence, nobody saw you.

Please put the lantern out.

Oh, sorry. Right.

We tried to not be seen.

I had it covered.

We weren't seen.

We're trying not to be hot also.

Yeah.

And then.

Cause that's bad for everybody. I don't know if you've been paying attention.

We have a plan.

Red, blue lights make it a lot easier to get caught.

I mean, until we get inside, probably.

But, you know, which would be why we had it covered.

So, like. Okay. No, we have a solid plan. Elliot, go.

Resident planner.

All right.

It's not my plan. Elliot, go. What?

You made the plan.

I didn't think. Yeah, we made it. Here we are. Hey, kids.

What's up?

The plan. We were gonna tell them the story.

Oh, yeah, that plan. All right, so here's the idea.

So bad.

He's old. Well, he's.

It's okay.

Give me a second.

Wind up his. Action. Wind up his.

I couldn't figure out why you lit the lantern. When we left it, it was out. I don't know who lit the lantern.

I had a good idea, so I did it.

Oh, okay.

It was completely covered the whole time.

We were purely to cover our ass if we got seen on the way here.

You do have one very nicely warmed piece of fabric.

I bet you do. All right, Skyler, here's the deal. If we get caught, we have talked to Mont Rouge. We're supposed to be looking to try to find the disappeared girls.

Okay.

And just so you know, that's actually what we're trying to do right now. Yes. So we're. That we are allowed to be doing this if we get. If we get caught. The story is we heard something here in the. The city hall, and we were trying to figure out what it was. You guys are looking for your strays. Dog Cat, you guys fill that in. And that's why we. We heard something. We looked in. You guys are trying to do something totally legitimate and innocent. You guys tell us what that is. That's the story. That's why we're in here.

I mean, like, obviously, the goal is not to get caught, but we have a plan.

In case we do happen.

In case we do. That's everybody's story. We all stick to the story. That's important. We all stick to the story.

Well, Skyler smacks Barry on the arm and says, hey, you got a dog, don't you? He's like, ow. Yeah.

Why'd you have to hit me, Dick?

I guess that could be my dog we're looking for.

Okay? We're Look. You guys were looking for Barry's dog. For some reason, you thought he might have got in here. You heard something. We walked along, saw somebody getting in here, went, what's going on? We came in. That's why we're all in here.

With that said, rule number one, don't volunteer information. Make them ask you for it.

Yes, sir.

Never incriminate yourself.

Plead the fifth. Yes or no answers are the best. Yeah, there's no Fifth anymore. Just give up on that.

They might know what?

That.

They probably don't.

That was.

I'm sorry.

Anyway, I know what the fifth is.

Good. Yeah. Don't say. It's a street.

Stitches.

Get stitches. Don't fucking say stuff.

Okay. This is devolving real fast.

Anyway, I'm. Yep.

Keep it simple. That's the story. You're looking for your dog. We saw you. What are you guys doing? And that's why we're all in here. Perfect.

Okay.

We saw the rapscallions.

Perfect.

So we thought we'd keep our shenanigans a little focused tonight and maybe give you guys, like, the real tour of the area, let you know what's up.

So we're not going loud immediately, is what you say.

No, cool.

We're not going loud.

We don't want to get caught, Right?

What shenanigans are you planning tonight?

We're gonna give you a real tour of the town.

Okay. Got it. Cool.

Cool sounds.

We'll start with city hall.

Okay.

You guys good at climbing?

Yes.

Yes.

The best, bro.

The best.

Probably.

Dude, that's the true answer right there.

This is a steel drain pipe over here. We can use it to get up to the window you see up there on the second floor. To get in, they pretty well secured all the windows on first, and the door is a Little Obvi.

Got it.

How many of the CKG are there? Total peoples. I know, but what's the name?

Halberry, Charlie Delaney and.

All right, the Alphabet squad's here.

And Skyler. So five.

Okay.

Five and five.

Okay, thank you.

Yep.

It's like 10 total people.

That might be important to have a.

Check at the last.

Hopefully not seeing how many people you can do a thing to if you need to.

Yep.

Is it Pass Without a Trace?

Nope. Okay, I don't have that one.

I'll just realize that it's not that she's good at climbing, she's just good at falling.

Okay, well, that's half the parkour.

Yes. Hey there, listener. It's time for the ad break. First off, I want to thank everyone who has been attending our Wizards and Wine events so far. We've gathered twice and both times have been completely sold out. And that's after adding 10 more tickets to our second event. I can't thank you all enough for coming and enjoying a night of fine wine and fun with us. Our next event is this Monday, November 10, and it's well on track to be sold out as well. And we're in kind of a cool problem here. We cannot increase our ticket sales anymore. 30 is our cap. So if you missed the Wizards and Wine event or you're trying to buy tickets for this coming Monday and we're sold out, fear not. We have events booked through the rest of the year. You'll be able to find all this on our social media, but just know that November 24th and December 8th are already on the books and they've already got some tickets sold. As I mentioned last time, I want to make sure and give our local game store board Fox Games a proper shout out. Trudy and her team have been absolutely massive help helps for us in getting this ball rolling. Whether it's by helping us find local connections, people seeking out our services, or even just helping us find people in adjacent fields that can be of assistance to us. We just got in touch with a fantastic 3D printer who I think will be giving a proper shout out to here in the near future. If your local plane, please swing by Trudy's shop and let them know that we sent you. That said, if you're not in the Valley, please make sure to stop by and peruse your local game store. The big guys are encroaching constantly. The Walmarts, the Amazons. But the small local game shops are where our community is actually being built. So please stop by. Say hi, there's A really, really good chance you'll be able to make some new friends there. Anyway, as always, thank you for listening. And here is the rest of the episode. So you see Skyler hop up and he just like monkey boys his way up this drain pipe like it's nothing. And there's a nice. They got. It's bolted to. It's a brick building. It's bolted to the brick wall with one of those U shaped brackets.

Yeah.

And he's able to kind of prop his feet on that and force the window up. He's clearly done this a fair few times. But he slips on inside. We do hear a small little. There was some shit in the way apparently.

Okay.

But then he sticks his head back out and he's like. All right, it's clear.

He's going first.

Elliot can. He'll run up.

This will surprise you. I'd like an athletics check.

Shocking.

No way, dude. Athletics.

Okay.

I can't argue for acrobat.

I would like to argue for acrobat.

19.

Yeah. Okay. Yeah. You're able to get up there no problem.

They're trying to ninja wall.

Like, how do you acrobatically climb a drain type?

I do parkour with how. That's an excellent question.

Chakra. I believe. I've seen it.

I used the force of my key.

Elliot can. Now that he's up, he can tell. Hey, Skyler, hang onto this and he'll drop a rope out. It might be easier to climb the rope than it might be to climb the deal. Or it can help anyway. Or we can attach it and if they fall, we can hold.

Oh yeah. Start a belay.

I was going to say, if nothing else, could we argue that having the rope there would give us advantage?

Sure. Okay, cool. That's probably as best as that's going to get.

Not against an acrobatics. You just got to convince me how you acrobatically crushed it.

You guys aren't even fucking ready for this discussion.

What do you just Edward your way into the window?

That's the second NAT20.

Yeah.

This dice is hot. I'm gonna keep rolling it.

He can just hand over hand.

What does Edwarding your way into a window mean?

Twilight.

I'm just gonna jump.

He literally just vampires just boing. Mario jump.

Okay, done.

Does anybody want to tell me a number that they rolled?

16.

16. You're able to get up there. Not quite as slick as Elliot it, but you're in there.

10.

You're struggling. You're having a hard time.

I would like to Assist Mel in my getting up to the window. This is how we're going to do that. So I rolled a nat 20 and I have a plus six. Yeah, so.

So he king Kongs with the 26.

I'm just going to like Hulk climb this.

Like.

Like she's in the window now. And I'm just like, cool. That was fun.

Sure.

Belle sets herself down, goes, shit, I'm better falling off of things, not climbing them.

I got a 17.

Cool. Yeah.

You're able to get in? I gingerly get into the ever so slack. I do do everything gingerly.

I've rolled five different dice and not one of them has rolled above a 10 yet.

What we need is some sage.

I hope if we get into combat, I hope I got some good rolls left. Don't waste them all right now.

I mean that was a good, you know, to help get everybody in.

But do the rest of the kids climb in pretty easy?

Yeah, they've done this a lot. You could tell that Al is the least adept. This is also the dude.

He's the one that kept eating shit.

Yeah, you could tell. He's the weirdest skater.

Yeah.

Mal is acutely aware that she's not 16.

But they're all able to get up in there. And you pop out into a very generic accountant's office.

Okay.

There's a decent monitor set up running into a decent PC on a fairly nice desk. You know, pictures of some middle aged lady with her kids and her husband.

A lot of cat calendars, a lot of cat calendars.

A lot of file folders. One of those wire things with the hanging folders.

Those cute little motivational posters on the wall say hang in there. Yeah.

You and I did the same because that's.

But meanwhile on their monitors they have little printouts of that. This is fine. Flaming theme for sure.

Every accountant I've met has an incredibly unique and not great sense of humor. There's a lot of jokes in a punish flavor without the fun. But it opens up into a pretty much black hallway. Black because of dark knot paint.

Fair boy.

This is a cheery city hall. Everything is painted black. Open your eyes, genius.

Stanley's in the lead and he's like. So like I said, you know, we didn't really understand anything we were looking at.

That's because we're an accountant's office.

Yep.

Those are numbers.

Yeah, well, unlike anything we found in here. We kind of dug through the clerk's office and then we realized we didn't know what any of that stuff was really.

Does city hall have a basement? Is that where, like, the jail is?

Yes and no. It has a basement. They didn't put the jail down there. Okay, we have a cell.

A single cell?

Yeah.

No, a cell.

A single cell.

I mean, I don't know. There wasn't last time we were here.

I mean, I guess. Do they have any security around the cell, or is this a building just. Just completely out of?

The building's pretty much shut down. I mean, if somebody gets too rowdy drunk, I think they'll bring them in and make them sleep it off. But so far our experience has been there's not like a dispatcher sitting by the phones or anything waiting. It's pretty much dead. Unless they need to come in.

The dispatcher's probably at home asleep with the phone next to her bed.

Probably some locally.

Yeah. Oh, not a fan.

Of course.

You're not talking like. They got these, like, really old ones they had to pull out of storage. They've got these, like, curly Q things attached to it. It's weird.

It's like a really fine line between technophilic and technophobic, and Mel has crossed it.

All right, well, show us the town.

Yeah. So they lead you through a couple. If you guys want, while they're leading you through these rooms, you can do some investigation. Investigation checks.

Yeah, I'd like to investigate.

I would too.

I can try.

I'm going to, like, the clerk's office.

Yeah. See if we find anything notable. Interesting. I find nothing. I'm rolled in that one. I am very anxious. I'm trying, but I'm not really processing my dice.

Want me dead.

Roll six, seven.

James the chef Carry us.

James to me.

You know, I was a cat person burglar at some point.

This is your territory.

So you go through the engineer's wing. The city engineer's wing.

Okay.

And you see, they've got one of those big racks for blueprints.

That's a nice rack of blueprints.

On one of the blueprint racks, you see has. It's got city hall, it's got the bank, it's got a couple other buildings.

That's actually like. I would like to study that and see if, like, any kind of.

Is there any sewers?

Yeah, that's exactly what I was looking for. I was looking for sewers.

Yeah, they've got something. They've got a water. A wastewater system.

Cool.

Is there like this.

It doesn't access it.

Yeah, I'm looking for, like, access points into buildings because if we could use.

Them to move between buildings that would be really helpful because they might be using them for the kidnapped people.

Roll a luck.

He thinks the dm, how common that is.

I don't think it's very.

It doesn't matter.

So we're gonna see if you're lucky or not.

That is an 11.

So the public works building has an access into the sewers.

Ha, ha.

We're not in the public works building.

They have a shop on the edge of town where they keep, like, the roadwork stuff and stuff.

So I bet you there's probably, like, a water room in this building for, like, the fire spring players and whatnot. But there's probably no meaningful access to the sewer lines or anything.

Yeah, well, I mean, that would have been planned access. Who knows what. What shenanigans have occurred since the takeover of the lc?

Does it look like any of the.

Blueprints are newer than others, L.A. contingent?

Yeah, you'll see.

Like the Lost Cajuns.

That works too.

They're not vampires. It's not the Lost Boys.

Sorry. Question was asked by somebody.

Do any of the blueprints look newer than the others? Like, are they organized in a chronological fashion? Is there any plans that look like they've been added or constructed?

You can see that city halls. Looks like it's been amended several times over the years, almost on an annual basis. And you see, the bank's got clearly several amendments. The Laundromat has some. But the most recent update was quite a ways back.

Okay, so none of these have, like, obvious sketches added to the official blueprints. Like, most of these blueprints are probably printed. Are there any better? Like, printed?

Well, so you saw them in the back of facilities, right? The blueprint bundles are like. Oh, yeah, thick.

Very thick.

Like a fuckload of pages for each one.

Think of, like, big book of blueprint.

Yeah. And they're literally. They're hanging. They're like this big. And each one weighs about 10, 15 pounds.

Yeah.

So, I mean, there's a lot of. I don't understand your question.

I was looking for any, like, recent ones that had, like, somebody that modified a building for an access point. If they added the access point onto.

A blueprint, you don't see anything that looks like.

That would probably be too obvious.

Yeah. And then you think for a second. And you don't think any thief has ever updated the blueprints after they add a secret door?

Well, you know, if the LC happened to.

You do see, the most recent upgrade to the bank was the vault downstairs.

Okay.

And it's You're a thief.

Mm.

And you rolled decent. This is one fucking hell of a vault.

Yeah. Dang.

But it's shockingly big for what you would assume a town this size needs.

Gotcha.

And it's got a weird amount of storage rooms nearby. And you see that it's basically. They have a elevator in the back of the first floor that drops down to the basement where the vault is kept.

Are there stairs to go down to the basement?

Yes, Right next to the elevator. And that's the only access point to the basement is Elevator, stairs.

Gotcha.

Down to this one hallway. It runs about the full length of the bank. This hallway. And there are like four or five storage rooms leading up to the bank vault door.

Gotcha.

Dang.

That's the only way into the vault. Only way out the of according to.

The blueprints are these blueprints in a French accent by chance the handwriting.

This is the upgrade that you see Skyler was talking about in the 90s.

Oh. Okay. You know, that would actually be a pretty good place to keep people.

Yes, it would be.

Is it gonna be a heck of a lot bigger and a heck of a lot more secure than a dinky single cell?

It would just have been super nice if there was a tunnel leading from here to over there. That would have been cool.

Doesn't mean there's not one. It just says it's not on the group.

Unfortunately, the sewer lines. It doesn't have a random jut that goes directly underneath the vault and then back over to the rest of the line.

That'd be handy.

It would have been super helpful. So it looks like the only access point into this safe is gonna be the stairs or the elevator.

Okay.

Both are gonna be down to no good. We're up to something good. Scott. Are you.

Kids any idea why they've got so much security on the bank?

I mean, like.

I mean, most banks just lock the doors at night and go home.

Especially nowadays.

Yeah. Like, what are you gonna do with money now?

Buy stuff?

Oh. I guess in this town where vending machines work, I guess you actually. Actually still need currency.

Vending machine works.

Vending machine works.

But I don't know.

It's gotten quite expensive because that's it.

Well, you can't get any more. Once it's empty, it's empty. Unless you have a bottling plant here in town.

We have electricity.

Nobody else?

Everyone else.

I mean, the stated reason, you know, is that's the money place I got you.

It just is kind of weird. A lot of people Are realizing that money's not that useful at this point, and it's trade. But I'm with you. I think something fishy's in that bank. Sky, is there anything else interesting here in the city hall building that you're in?

Yeah, I mean, we got.

Cause we're still upstairs, right?

Yeah, we're still upstairs.

And the way this place is laid out, you're getting the vibe that city is upstairs, cops are downstairs.

Fair.

Gotcha.

Okay.

So he takes you through, and he's like, this is the clerk's office. You guys want to look right in there. I can get fresh investigations.

Go. That's better.

Go, Go Gadget dies. Nope, that's better. 11. Not really.

I can do math. 17 again.

16.

16.

That might help this time.

Kyle got lost in cubicle land. She doesn't even know where she is right now.

We're over here.

The toy group is over here.

Oh, there you went.

I resist the urge to use mage hand. I just pat my actual hand up, and you just see it poking over the cubicles.

You're rifling through somebody's desk. It's the person that's, like, the most controlled chaos person.

Got it.

And you find the deed to the former Laird's land, which is now Mortar Rouge's house.

You say mayor. Oh, I heard.

I heard lair as well.

I was so confused.

Mayor's lair.

Oh, my God.

That means I'm a lawyer.

Actually, that makes more sense.

Okay, I'm like, what lawyer? I thought we didn't have any of those.

Yeah, yeah, those died first.

In towns, you actually find a copy of the former mayor's death certificate? Filled it out for him.

Perfect.

Oh, what does it say, cause of death on that certificate?

It says natural causes. Okay, you do see Mortar Rouge's signature.

Oh, okay, well, Mortar Rouge signed former mayor's death certificate.

Okay, well, this isn't. The house. Could have fallen on him for all we know.

Right?

And the thing that you guys put your heads together and you find a little weird is the paperwork for the former mayor's land. The former mayor's land.

Yeah.

That's a tough one.

Started two days before he died.

Died.

Oh, two days.

That's fishy.

Yeah, that's. That's how that always goes. There's no. No, that's pure coincidence. Obviously. Obviously.

When you put that together, Skyler's like, yeah, you guys were right to bring here. I. I didn't put that together.

Nope. The.

The.

What's the official story on how the Mare pet died?

He had Like a heart attack or something. And the mayor was a big boy and an old boy.

Sure.

So when people just said the mayor passer, it was just kind of like.

Yeah, okay. Well, yeah, it sure doesn't look like maybe it was a coincidence.

Possible it's a coincidence, but it seems pretty.

It still looks fishy.

As the attending doctor of someone who mysteriously died, we are buying the house.

Two days before they die.

Did the mayor not have any family?

He had like, kids. They were off elsewhere.

College maybe places.

All right.

Okay.

He's old enough. They were adults.

Yeah.

Not in town.

Yeah, no, they left.

Okay.

His wife died two years prior.

Really sad.

Okay.

Bummer, man.

Gotcha.

Are you sure?

You know, broke her heart. The whole town wept.

Gotcha.

She died of a broken heart.

Making things up on the fly.

Oh, no.

Anyway, I don't even have to roll an insight on that one.

Well, I say we keep looking.

Blueprints on the. On his house.

Oh, good lord. Get off the blueprint. Well, I don't know if like.

Cuz you saw that they were primarily business prints.

Okay.

No, no blueprints.

Okay.

I don't know.

I'm being thorough.

Yes, you are. You're being very thorough. Good job. James.

I found a really cute cat calendar.

Leave it.

Float around through here for a little while longer. You get pretty confident that you've sussed what you're gonna suss out of city hall.

Okay. Gotcha. Okay.

The DM is telling us that the tour is moving on.

Moving on.

All right, what's the next really cool building? Yo.

From here we don't break into much more, but there's a couple places I think you should just kind of see, like look at and stuff.

Okay.

You know, like for sure. So we gotta get back down.

Else give yourself a pep talk after the embarrassing climbing incident.

She's gonna just jump out the window, straight nail a superhero landing, right? Just like boom.

Mel is down for that, yo.

You see Skylar pretty smoothly just slide down the pole, lifts up the drain pipe. He's at the bottom now.

That was glorious. That was like a fireman.

Elliot will show everybody how to wrap a rope around him so they can actually belay themselves down the rope.

Okay.

Mel would like to acrobatically exit the window.

Okay. How you just swan dive and tuck and roll on the floor?

Not swan dive. There's a definite like she hangs her feet over the edge and like braces herself and then just leaps.

Mel has jumped from a second story window more than once.

This is true. And it's like slight of hand, I guess, for.

I think you don't have to as a monk, you just roll to reduce the damage of falling. And if you reduce it to zero, you know, I think I'm going to do that.

Yeah. As a reaction, I know I can reduce the falling damage, but I can guarantee you it was not pretty based off of my roll.

Despite being good at acrobatics, this one wasn't.

I. I have not rolled above a 10 with any of my dice yet.

We need to change her dice out.

I have been. I'm running out of D20s.

Her dice needs a pit stop.

Pit stop.

I almost brought my dice jail, and.

I kind of think I should have tiny.

Those round things are called tires. They go under their car.

Yeah. Go ahead and roll to reduce your damage and tell me what you get.

Yeah, you can your reaction when you fall. To reduce any falling damage, you take by an amount equal to five times your funk level.

So I don't need to roll for that? No, that's good.

We are level seven, so it's 35 points. So you don't take any damage from falling. But it's not as graceful as you.

It is not graceful. I totally land on my ass.

Yeah, you flap, but it's not painful.

Your sinus is clear.

Now the rest of you, getting down. You're belaying. Yeah, I want to roll.

I'm also going to belay.

Okay. I shouldn't have rolled.

I shouldn't have done that.

Well, you rolled it.

6 plus 6. 12.

12.

It's not graceful. Yeah, I'm gonna try to. I wanna try to slide like the kid did to, like, see if I can, like, do it as smoothly. And I'm.

You hang up your.

I'm gonna catch the U joint, the U clip, and you're like, ow, damn it.

Towards the bottom. And it just kind of tilts you away instead of force on your toes.

Yeah, I stumble backwards.

I'm probably just gonna climb down the pipe.

Okay, give me an athletics if you're climbing down the pipe.

Yeah.

14.

Nice.

Yeah.

Again, none of y' all look near as cool as Skyler.

Damn kid showed me up on that one.

He is pretty impressed with the blaying trick. He's like, all right, that might be worth learning.

Yes.

Elliot's not gonna. He will be on the rope holding it. Wirebury belays. He'll climb down after everybody's out.

Okay.

Somebody has to hold the rope. Cause he needs the rope.

Athletics your way down.

Oh, honestly, that should have been me. What Was I thinking, all right, look.

At this, I'm gonna jump out the one.

It wasn't all that great.

It was 12, okay?

If I had a nickel for every time I got showed up by an old guy, I'd have two nickels today and today, which isn't a lot, but it's weird that I have happened twice.

In his defense, the old guy is tough and cool, so just let it go.

What's that saying? Fear the old men in the profession where they die young?

Yeah.

Yes.

I could have phrased that way better, but you know what I mean.

I followed. I followed. Is that the. I don't know.

Fear the old man in a profession where they die young.

Yeah.

Same exact words you said, just with confidence.

I still have alcohol going through my system, so I don't know if I'm speaking correct words.

Nah, you're fine.

So, yeah, they. You guys are down on ground floor. We can. You guys rolled an average 13. We can let that ride. Or you could try to do better if you want to.

I would like to try again.

Okay. Stealthy groups. Group stealth, please.

Don't be showing up with the old man. That's better. Don't be showing up with the old man.

Oh, yeah. It's not happening.

Fuck me. Eight.

Okay, eight plus four. Jesus.

Okay, 26. He got nat. 20.

Nice. That helps the average.

It helps the average, but I really.

Brought us down with that two.

There.

You guys are doing much better this time.

All right, good job. Wait a. Carry me out of there. I sorry.

Stop apologizing and just shut up.

You're now at an average 16.

That's much better, I think.

Yes.

Yes, it is. What do we got here?

I think your numbers are better unless it's damaged. Coming at you. Oh, gosh.

Good job, kids. Fuck. Good job, kids.

They just vanish off the face of the earth.

Where'd they go?

They've done this a few times.

I got fucking four 18s.

Sweet.

Yeah.

12 plus 18 plus 16. Not their first rodeo, so they got like about a 16. 17.

And that's how they talk so far.

I don't even know what a rodeo is. Is tonight, apparently.

So, yeah. All y' all doing a decent job. The sneaky sneaks of the sneaky fridal. And thankfully, the cops are not being very observant.

Good.

So they take you down the back way towards the bank and the laundromat. You guys saw the front. You saw that there were two guards posted up front of the bank. You see the back has another two.

Damn.

And the Laundromat's got the exact same level of security as the bank.

Why the laundromat?

The Laundromat's weird, right?

That's the one that I'm confused about. The bank kind of makes sense. But why? What's so important about the Laundromat?

I mean, I don't know.

That's.

We met that Nikki, right?

Yeah, that's what she was.

She was really out of it.

We were told to go to the Laundromat because we were.

Well, we were doing clothes and it was during the day, though. Maybe there's something going on at night because, like, feels like they're almost on full lockdown in both buildings. Like, don't come in here. It's strange.

Yeah. City hall, the bank kind of makes sense. The line, dramatic.

Like.

What?

Yeah, it's weird.

Anyway, sorry.

Unless, like, the coins matter. I don't know. Do we use coins? I don't. I wasn't picking paying attention.

It's just money. The argument that they gave Towne was that these are the two places with the most cash on hand.

Who else wants to have, like, you open up a dryer and it's actually a secret passage?

Like, how cool would that be?

That's a cool secret tunnel. I'm down.

When we were doing our clothes, was there an out of order machines?

That's a whole different secret tunnel.

I mean, you guys weren't like super looking for one?

We weren't. That's why I never asked. It wasn't described.

But yeah, we were more concerned about the. The.

Let's say that between that and. You guys handled that interaction in a confusing fashion A little bit anyway.

Yes.

I think that's where your focus was.

Yeah.

Okay.

Hey, Skyler, do you know if there are any out of order machines on the Laundromat? You don't do laundry, do you?

No, I'm sure not.

Give it 10.

All right, Skyler, what are you showing us?

He starts taking you up. You know, you've been up this way enough times. Now you're headed towards Mortar Rouge's house.

Okay. Okay.

This kid's got some stones.

Don't throw them.

Nice thing is the way Mortar Rouge's house is set up is. You can see it from a fair bit. It's not like in a tight neighborhood or anything. He's got a decent chunk of land. Nothing like crazy, but like, you know, he's got a nice sized yard wrapped around his property. And you see that his house has clearly got four guards and they're actually patrolling around its area. They got the same blue lanterns, but they've got them set up to where they're actually, like, throwing light a little better.

Oh, they're like bullseye lanterns.

Yeah, that's. Thank you. Bullseye lanterns. Still that blue light, but they're very much using them and looking as they're touring.

So they're just walking around the house in the yard.

It's like ghost trees.

Or are they outside wandering around?

They're in the yard. Very, very it. Is that a Metal Gear Solid? You see a cardboard box nearby?

I could make one. I have illusion spells. I can make us a box.

There you go.

That is in my box of tricks.

Kylie says, like I said, most of what I wanted to do was just kind of help you guys see what I think you guys need to see.

Right.

Mortarouch's place is on lockdown.

Banking and Laundromat.

Strangely, yeah. Laundromat banker on lockdown. And we know that there's another couple guys that are roaming patrolling streets. They, from what we've seen so far, don't really seem to be on any kind of, like, schedule. They kind of go where their heart desires, which is, you know, good and bad. Odds of running into them are slim, but you can run into them pretty much anywhere. Yeah. Not just patrolling Maine.

They don't have a set route, so it's hard to predict where they are.

So, Scott, how many people that. Are you. How many people are patrolling town at night? Typically, I'm like four.

Yeah.

And are they running in pairs of two?

Yeah, they're definitely a buddy system.

So you've got two groups covering town, so it's not too hard to stay out of their way again.

Yeah.

And there's the people on the tower, right?

Yeah. The gate's got two guys at all times. That's the only gate. In and out is the.

As long as we avoid that. We should avoid the bird's eye view.

Sure.

In the ears of the hawk up there.

Yeah.

Huh.

And then we've got. So we've got four on the outside of Montrouge's hat house.

Are there any inside? I don't know. Yeah, we know he's got the super creepy butler dude.

Yeah. And we know we've got four at the bank and four at the laundromat and two at city Hall.

No, I think I misdescribed that. At some point, City hall didn't have active security.

Oh, I thought. I thought we had two in the front. Oh, okay, I misunderstood.

The bank and the Laundromat had two in front and two in back.

Okay. But they typically don't patrol except for the grounds. They're not running around town.

No.

They're staying.

No.

And the guys you saw at the Laundromat and the bank are very much more like bouncer mode.

Gotcha.

Just posted at the entrances.

Exactly. And they're scanning, you know, but they're not moving.

Okay.

Do they sit there all night? Do they have, like. Do they swap out at some point?

I mean. Yeah.

Did they do that on a regular? Like a set schedule?

You have any idea when that happens?

I haven't looked.

Okay, fair. Fair.

But I mean, yeah, I mean, they're people. So, like, you have to sleep.

Yeah.

I mean, you don't. And Skyler, you don't know any back ways, hidden passages into Mont Rouge's the Laundromat or the bank?

No, no, I definitely don't know how to get in the bank, but I do know. So you guys are saying that you got.

You're.

You're.

You guys are investigating the missing?

We're trying to find them, yeah.

Charlie Doggo Angel's mom, she works at fashion. Works at the bank.

And one of the others worked at the Laundromat.

Charlie, you are not helping our cover.

This break. Brought to you by Shamrock Sheep.

Sure, it's been a. No, it was just that Nikki had been met at the Laundromat. Worth noting, though, that everyone who has disappeared has knows someone who works with one of the agents.

Got you.

Where is the Laundromat in relation to the bank?

Basically, same block.

Okay.

Like, they're pretty close, if not.

So the guards at one are visible from the guards at the other?

Yes, 100%.

Oh, that's going to make that more difficult.

Yeah.

So what we do is we go in through the room.

Now, I picture in the Laundromat on the corner of the block.

Okay. Okay.

And it's kind of. It used to be a soda fountain.

Right.

So I'm kind of picturing that Americana painting of the dude sitting at a diner.

Oh, with like, the glass.

Yeah.

That picture in basically that layout. But now there's a fuckload of laundry machines instead of a bar. And so the side you saw, that was the back. The building's longer than it is wide.

Yeah.

Okay.

The back entrance was on an alley on the less wide side. Does that make sense?

Yeah.

And we'll say sticks out further than the bank. So the bank's almost a square with a longer rectangle. Butted up next to it for the Laundromat.

Does the bank and the laundromat actually share a wall? Or they're just next to each other?

Okay, your idea about getting on the roof is good. I can get us on the roof.

I had a good idea.

And then on the other side of the laundromat. The other side of the laundromat was City Hall.

Yeah, but like across the street, like right on the corner. So picture Main Street, City hall, across the street, Laundromat bank.

Yeah, yeah, but it's on the same side of the street.

Same side.

How would you be able to get us on the roof?

All of which is the opposite side of the street from the inn.

Besides Broom, I'm an.

I'm an old guy. I know how to do shit.

Okay. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna argue with you. You were able to spider monkey your way up into the building.

We have to decide. I think we're only gonna pull one of these off if we want to do it. We need to decide which one we want to try to get into.

Is it something we want to do tonight or do we want to have more time exploring town during daylight hours and doing some investigating that first.

Do security cameras work?

I would like. I would like to do some daylight investigation. My concern is that we're not going to gain anything. But you are right. If we. If we start.

How fast do we want to burn bridges?

Exactly? We know we're going to burn bridges. We just don't know when we want to start the fire. If we start climbing in and breaking into buildings, there's a good chance that we will have lit up that bridge.

Like maybe we should do some legit investigation first.

I like that. I think that's.

And then that might give us direction on which one of these we want to.

Right? Yeah. Cuz once we. Once we break into one, breaking into the other one, it becomes infinitely more difficult.

Well.

And I think it would be worth it talking to the one who works at the bank who had the family members. I also think that it might be worth revisiting the Laundromat with an eye to observe things that are not normal in a Laundromat.

I do have to clean this new outfit.

Yes. There we go.

Angelique is the one that had her mom works at the bank.

Yes.

Okay. I think that we should talk to her.

And she's the most recent that went missing before.

Skylar, I've got a question. This is important question. And we don't need an answer tonight. But I want you to think about it. Do you and your friends want to stay here in this town?

I need more information.

Well, we're not going to be staying.

Okay.

I can't tell you when we're gonna leave because. Because number one, we don't know since.

Depends on when we start lighting bridges on fire.

When we. Yeah. It's gonna be up to you guys if you want to leave town. You might be able to come with us if you should. So choose.

It's up to you guys what side of the bridge you wanna be on when we light it.

Right.

But we do kinda need to know. Determine how much you. Cause if you're gonna stay, we do not want you to get tied into this. Cause you're gonna have to live here. You see what I'm saying?

I mean, you can leave, but I would not travel with us. We are a danger to ourselves and others.

Right? We could get you safely out of town. And it's dangerous as out there. But that being said, we don't want to get you tied to anything. Because if you have to live here.

I don't know if I'm going to stay here or not. But I'm getting Angelique.

Okay.

Okay.

I can either help you guys or I can keep doing my own thing. And I'd rather not accidentally. My own thing? Your thing. Out of the way.

Fair. That totally makes sense. Again, you don't have to make this decision right now. Because we're probably gonna piss some really important people off. And if you're tied with us, you're gonna get the fallout.

Yeah. I don't care if you live here. You will be safe.

Got it.

I mean, if we're wildly successful, the people that we piss off won't actually be around to be pissed off.

So.

Comfortable. We have a new T shirt by the way. This is.

Oh, absolutely.

No. Don't pump the seat.

Don't fuck with the sea, Cagey. That's awesome. All right, Skylar. I think we need to get snuck back in and get to bed.

Yeah.

It's getting pretty close to midnight. If you want a long rest. You should probably sleep soon.

Yep. And then.

That's a weird way to phrase that, Skyler. Is that some new lingo like that? We don't know.

This kid really isn't just self care.

So, Skylar, tomorrow we're going to. We're gonna do some daylight legit. We've been okayed investigation.

Okay.

And try to find out what's going on. We'll get in Touch with.

You can almost always find us at the skateboard.

Perfect.

All right, sounds good.

We tend to randomly spawn.

There we go. You know what? When the time comes, I'll come show you some new trips, tricks.

If we break any more fourth walls, this place is gonna come crashing down.

So unless you guys can think of anything, I think we need to head back, get some sleep, and start our daylight tomorrow.

Agreed?

Agreed.

Awesome. Yeah, we've got at least some leads to go on. I would agree with that. Wrap it up.

We got some leg work we gotta do.

And don't forget, we still gotta find Edna too.

That's true.

What?

Edna? Edna. We gotta find a girlfriend.

This just sounded like one long ex wife. We need to find her.

I believe it'll be his first ex wife.

Yes.

Oh, that's right.

I don't know if X counts, he'll be a widower.

Huh?

No, we're not letting Edna die anytime soon.

I'm not married to her.

We don't know how long she's got left.

Okay.

So, like, anyway, it was really nice to see you again.

Unless she's tied to a weird, really large fortune. I'm not married.

Mel is trying super hard to recover her dignity after the climbing incident.

Sometime we could show you how to not do that.

That. That would be great. Thank you.

Looks like you're so concerned.

Are you okay?

She's got really sturdy ankles.

Thank you.

Right now he's gonna think I'm all done with ankles.

No, you can take a fall. That's what I'm saying.

Sorry, I. I don't think anyone's ever.

Been to scream that way before.

Well, you're welcome for the novel experience.

Thanks.

Hey, nice ankles.

Those ankles sure do look sturdy, ma'.

Am.

Yeah, as someone who does not have sturdy ankles, that's usually like. I would love to have sturdy ankles.

Why did Beetlejuice look if you're getting.

Sling Blade compliment for somebody out of the ground.

Oh, my, what a compliment.

Okay, so unless anybody's got something, we're gonna.

No. I am dexterous. I am not athletic.

Almost anime. Dip into the shadows.

Perfect.

Cool to see KG dips out of you. And let's go with one more round of stealthy.

Can we just keep.

Can we just keep the last one?

All right, one more. And perceptions.

God damn. Perceptions.

So you can see where the people are.

That's not great.

I want to see.

Hi.

I'm above a 1015 for my stealth.

I got a 14 stealth and a 5 perception.

Oh, God.

Ha. 14 perception.

16 stealth. 18 perception.

19 stealth. 22 perception. All right.

So not the best stealth, guys. 1010 stealth.

That's what I rolled on the die.

Yeah. And then a 14 perception.

Hey, we're all in double digits. That is a win.

I think he pulled the average up.

Yeah.

Because I didn't roll a two.

Yeah.

The same as you did last time. Cool. Good job, team.

Yay.

Kai.

Yeah.

We're going to take a break here pretty shortly.

On it.

Yeah, it's your middlest. Almost exact dead center of your two stealths.

All right.

Slightly better than half. Went from a 13 to a 16 to a 14.8.

Can we round up to 15? I feel like that.

Yeah. There you go. See? Look at you guys. You look worried.

As someone who is regularly getting like in the 20s for a perception check. Yeah, I can. I can see our group.

You're getting seepy. And the thing that really helps you guys is you can pretty much all of you except for one person.

Whoever rolled the five, that was me. I'm not seeing shit.

Did a good job at seeing people. And actually you're gonna have damn near the exact same perception average. You got a 14 point stealth. That is very pretty. So a 15 perception and a 15 stealth.

Yay.

Yay.

Yay, team. So yeah, you're able to make your way back, slip back in, make it up to your rooms. We'll let that.

Right.

Get a long rest.

Sweet.

And let's take a break.

Cool.

Figure out why my dog won't shut up.

Is this an episode break or just a break?

Probably just a break.

Real quick. Yeah. Hit space bar.

Hold on. Yeah. Yeah, that's going to things up actually. Yeah, that could be an episode break. Theater of the Mind presents Retribution as Amanda Arston as Mel Kelly Jeremy Jimmy Arsten as Elliot Brandybane Michael Burnell as Ulnock Vargar Johnson Michael Downes as James o' Brien Casey Weingarten as Emery Lee and myself, Mike Schock as your dungeon Master. We release episodes every two weeks, so our next episode will drop on November 23rd. Happy Fibonacci Day for our mathematically inclined followers. If you want to follow us, our social media and website can be found on our link tree which can be found in the podcast description. Also in the podcast description, you can find a link to Pinecast as well as our referral code to get you 40% off your first four months of a paid membership, as well as our referral link to Epidemic Sound which gets you a one week trial period to their excellent platform. Our music this week was sourced from Epidemic Sounds, who We are not sponsored by under the Creative Cummins license. The songs used in order are.

The.

Spy by Wendy Marcini and Elvin Vanguard, now that's an Alarm by Harry Edvino and Under the Dark sky by Johan Glossner. The Theatre of the Mind theme ad break and outro were written by Mike Schock. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of our collective imagination or are used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual events, places or people, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Oh yeah, this directly in the mic.

I'm so sorry.

This you want to do.

I guess I don't.

Turn towards this monitor is off. I don't know if it should go wrong.

I was gonna say something instead.

Well, you did say something.

Say is a strong word.

You made a statement.